How to Use the Directory

Welcome to the Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss Directory. This blog is maintained by volunteers to act like a "telephone book" for blogs dealing with the loss of a baby. It is open to anyone who has ever lost a baby in any way - we do not discriminate by age of your baby or circumstance of your loss. If you think you belong here, then we think you belong here.

When you submit your blog, it is manually added to the list, so it may take some time for it to appear on the list. When you submit your information as requested below, it is easier to spot those emails that have been redirected into the spam mail.

Blogs are listed by category of loss. This is to help you find blogs that deal with circumstances that may be similar to yours. That being said, it can be a moving and healing experience to read the blogs of people who's loss is not similar to yours. You are welcome to read any of the blogs listed here.

Though there could be literally thousands of categories of loss, we have created 4 broad categories: before 20 weeks, after 20 weeks, after birth, and medical termination. Please note that most blogs dealing with extreme prematurity are listed in the "after birth" category even though the gestational age might suggest a different category.

As a warning to those feeling particularly fragile, many of the blogs listed here discuss living children or subsequent pregnancies. In the sidebar links, those blogs are usually marked with an asterisk(*). However, the circumstances of individual bloggers will change, and sometimes the listings do not get updated. It is possible to encounter pictures of living children or pregnant bellies on the blogs listed here.

We also have a list of resources (books), online links, and online publications that you may find useful. Scroll all the way to the bottom of the page to see the full listing of links.

We are so sorry the loss of a beloved child has brought you here. We hope that you will find some solace within the community that has gathered.
Please help us set up this resource for grieving families by:

Welcome

A. Submitting your blog information
(Email Subject: Please Add My Blog)
  • The link to your blog
  • The title of your blog
  • The topic of your blog (see sidebar - Personal Blogs)
  • If your blog discusses living children or subsequent pregnancy after loss

B. Submitting links to helpful web resources
(Email Subject: Please Add This Link)

C. Submitting titles of helpful reading materials or videos/films
(Email Subject: Please Add This Resource)

D. Adding a link to this site from your blog

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Saturday, June 16, 2007

Friday Blog Roundup - in celebration of Fathers

When we talk about Thomas, the pain in My Beloved's eyes mirrors my own; the faraway, lost look of someone with sorrow so deep it's virtually bottomless. We lost the same, small boy that sunny March day. We lost our son. No one in the whole world understands what it was like to lose Thomas the way my husband does. Because he was Thomas' father.

He is Thomas' father.

Fathers aren't represented here in blogland quite the same way mothers are. Women, let's face it, like to talk. Need to talk. Men deal with the complexities of sorrow and grieving in other, sometimes seemingly mysterious ways. And often those ways are specifically engineered to protect us, the mothers who they have seen cry rivers of tears, and whom they want so badly to shield from more pain. Even their own.

But there are fathers here. Fathers who bravely document their sorrow and their journey through grief in heart-wrenchingly open and honest posts.

And since tomorrow is Father's Day, I thought it only fitting to celebrate the words of all the fathers who have chosen to give us a glimpse into the hearts and minds of grieving dads.

And in doing so, I hope this will celebrate all fathers in mourning, even those strong silent types who keep so much of their sorrow to themselves.

If you are a father in mourning who blogs - or who occasionally contributes to his partner's blog - please post a link to your blog in the comments. I confess I'm only aware of one father blogger (Dad/Drummer, whose most recent post on the first anniversary of his son Aaron's death, is so beautiful it will make you ache) but I'm sure there must be more.

Now is your chance to stand up and be recognized by a grateful blogging community.

Because we love you.

1 comment:

Carole said...

Thank you so much for sharing this. Men do have such a burden...not only are they grieving...they are oftentimes trying to be strong for those around them.
~Carole